Quick update

Hello All,
First of all, a big thanks to my muffin stealing sister for taking up some of the slack here. Umm, muffins....were they Blueberry by any chance?
I have to set the record straight. I was not in love with that Hickory nut. I simply enjoyed his smokey flavor and no kidding, that's the biggest Hickory Nut I've ever seen. I just brought it to the food lady so that she could see it in all it's nutty enormousness. Between you and me, I think she might be insane.
The human people are home here with the stomach virus. I sure hope I don't get that. I'm keeping my distance and wearing a surgical mask as well as a newspaper sailor hat the provider man made for me. I don't know, sometimes I just feel festive and like to show it.
Yappy day to you all! The writing dog is back!
Mmmmm, muffins.
Rowdy

I Must Protest

First I must apologize to Rowdy for hijacking his website. But since he hasn't written you get me...Rowdy's less literary sister.

I must protest the treatment I received tonight at the hands of my human.

1. If you leave warm muffins on the counter do not blame me if I eat them. Why would I prefer the same bland dog food to hot steaming cinnamon muffins. If you didn't want me to eat them you shouldn't have left them out.
2. It is not fair to make me stand outside in the rain as punishment. I don't make you stand in the rain when you leave me inside too long or forget to feed me until late.
3. You should know that I've contacted the local Human Society to see about pressing charges.
4. You can rectify this situation by giving me some cheese.

Massy

A Dear John?

To my human:
I am confused. Am I not a good dog? I don't pee on the floor, I don't eat your socks (often), I don't attack the orange and white furball or the gray furball (at least not without provocation), and when I escape from the backyard I don't run away. So why have you abanoned me? You have been gone a lot recently. I understand if you need a break from the furballs occasionally, (I do too, so next time you should take me with you). But do you have to go so often?
I do thank you for leaving my old human to take care of me. But he comes with another human and two little humans. They're okay, but they move very quickly. Please, lets discuss this when you return. Surely I can travel with you. You need me there to make sure you are properly covered with dog hair and saliva.

Miss you,
Massy

Woof!!